lifes_sake: (staredown)
Author: lifes_sake
Cam studies. He studies madly. The next week elapses with him having very little sense of individual days. He doesn't want anyone to know anything special is up, so he goes to a movie with Renée and to a friend's house after school to play Nintendo games and Charlie gets his weekly phone call and he shows up to his classes and gets his homework adequately done. But other than that he studies. He wants to be fluent in this thing inside three months if possible. It's easier than Spanish, he's motivated, he can use it in everyday conversations as he asks passing animals and convenient plants how smart they are (dogs: smarter than goats; squirrels: about goat level; his friend's hamster: dumb as a rock; shrubs: way dumber than trees; indoor potted rosemary: just a step above grass) and chats with Grace, he's basically dropping himself in an immersion course with some inconvenient English here and there so he can interact with humans. He thinks three months is ambitious but reasonable.

He's not actually doing that many spells. He does wheedle tofu into tastiness on a nightly basis, and when he feels a cold coming on he looks up a spell about that, but he wants to know what he's doing before he gets going on what he most wants to be doing, because he wants to be doing big things. He swore to oppose death. He meant that.

Today he is preparing to oppose death in his backyard. It's threatening rain and he doesn't want to be all the way down the street with Leafy if the clouds open up. The jerk tree doesn't talk to him if he doesn't talk to it and it's perfectly serviceable as something to sit under, anyway.
pythbox: A book. (Default)
Author: pythbox
When he sits down, an irritable not-voice that isn't the same as the tree says, "Hey! Watch where you're parking that!"
lifes_sake: (profile)
Author: lifes_sake
"Sorry - what - who said that?" Cam asks, getting up again and stumbling a step when he's on his feet again.
pythbox: A book. (Default)
Author: pythbox
"Down here," snorts the voice. "You animate people, always putting yourselves inconvenient places."

Under the tree is some grass, some dirt, and a rock. It's not an especially interesting-looking rock, although there might be traces of long-faded paint on its surface.
lifes_sake: (absorbed)
Author: lifes_sake
Cam sits not-on-the-rock. "You are... more talkative than typical rocks," he observes. "Have you got a fossil in you or something? Did somebody use to talk to you a lot?"
pythbox: A book. (Default)
Author: pythbox
"I used to be somebody's pet rock," says the rock. "Not that it's any of your business."
lifes_sake: (vexed)
Author: lifes_sake
"Okay, okay," says Cam. If the rock doesn't want to be friendly it can join the tree in not talking to Cam.
pythbox: A book. (Default)
Author: pythbox
The rock says nothing more for a few seconds.

Then it sys, less belligerently, "What're you up to, anyway?"
lifes_sake: (withdrawn)
Author: lifes_sake
"Studying," says Cam.
pythbox: A book. (Default)
Author: pythbox
"Studying what?"
lifes_sake: (staredown)
Author: lifes_sake
"The Speech. Lot of symbols to learn."
pythbox: A book. (Default)
Author: pythbox
"Figures," says the rock. It gives the impression that if it had a point of articulation with which to do so, it would be nodding.
lifes_sake: (tranquil)
Author: lifes_sake
Cam supposes it does figure, since he's talking to a rock. He goes on scribbling practice (true) sentences in Grace.
pythbox: A book. (Default)
Author: pythbox
"So you're a wizard?" says the rock.
lifes_sake: (absorbed)
Author: lifes_sake
Cam's not clear on whether sarcasm counts as lying. "Yep," he says, instead of no, I just hold conversations with rocks by unrelated mechanisms.
pythbox: A book. (Default)
Author: pythbox
"I was a wizard's pet rock," sighs the rock. "Sorry, pal."
lifes_sake: (Default)
Author: lifes_sake
"Sorry?"
pythbox: A book. (Default)
Author: pythbox
"Never mind," it says hastily. "Forget I said anything."
lifes_sake: (once more)
Author: lifes_sake
"How'd you get in my yard, anyway?"
pythbox: A book. (Default)
Author: pythbox
"Oh, you know how it is," says the rock. "Kicked down the street, thrown over fences..."
lifes_sake: (charisma)
Author: lifes_sake
"I don't in fact know much about what it's like to be a rock."
pythbox: A book. (Default)
Author: pythbox
"Ever kicked one down the street?" it inquires.
lifes_sake: (profile)
Author: lifes_sake
"Not that I remember off the top of my head. Maybe."
pythbox: A book. (Default)
Author: pythbox
"Meh," says the rock, "it probably wasn't me, anyway."
lifes_sake: (staredown)
Author: lifes_sake
"Probably not," Cam agrees.
pythbox: A book. (Default)
Author: pythbox
"And there's not a lot of wizards' pet rocks kicking around," it says dryly.
lifes_sake: (absorbed)
Author: lifes_sake
"I'd imagine not. Where's your wizard? Do you want me to drop you in the mail or something?"
pythbox: A book. (Default)
Author: pythbox
"Where he's gone, buddy, you're not gonna have much luck mailing me."
lifes_sake: (profile)
Author: lifes_sake
"Did he die or something, or do you just mean he went to Antarctica and didn't bring you?"
pythbox: A book. (Default)
Author: pythbox
The rock's not-voice lets out a not-sigh.

"He died."
lifes_sake: (withdrawn)
Author: lifes_sake
"That's a pity," says Cam.

He doesn't expect wizards in general to be immortal. Most people don't share his opinion on the subject, and even a wizard who agreed with him might find it a difficult project, especially with the power cut with age.
pythbox: A book. (Default)
Author: pythbox
"Yep," says the rock.
lifes_sake: (staredown)
Author: lifes_sake
Cam does not have a clear assessment of the personality of this rock. He's not really sure if he wants to talk to it, which pretty much adds up to only responding if it says something that prompts a response.
pythbox: A book. (Default)
Author: pythbox
The rock leaves him alone, for a little while.
lifes_sake: (Default)
Author: lifes_sake
Cam goes on studying, peering up at the sky periodically. At one point he asks his manual if sarcasm counts as lying for wizard purposes. For that matter, song lyrics and relating acknowledged fictional stories, also important to know about, not that Cam's much of a singer or a storyteller.
pythbox: A book. (Default)
Author: pythbox
All those things are usually fine, as long as the intent is not to deceive.

"Hey," says the rock. "Hey, wizard. What's your name?"
lifes_sake: (tranquil)
Author: lifes_sake
"Cam," says Cam. "What's yours?"
pythbox: A book. (Default)
Author: pythbox
"Iggy," says the rock.
lifes_sake: (teasing)
Author: lifes_sake
"That's cute."
pythbox: A book. (Default)
Author: pythbox
"Adorable," it agrees.
lifes_sake: (absorbed)
Author: lifes_sake
Study, study, study. "Hey, manual, is it generally a bad idea to control the weather? Can I control the weather?"
pythbox: A book. (Default)
Author: pythbox
The manual informs him that controlling the weather is usually a bad idea because it inevitably has effects beyond the immediate desired changes, and those effects are very difficult to predict or control without extensive meteorological knowledge.
lifes_sake: (absorbed)
Author: lifes_sake
Fair enough. It was worth asking.
pythbox: A book. (Default)
Author: pythbox
"What do you want to control the weather for?" asks Iggy.
lifes_sake: (resolute)
Author: lifes_sake
"Weather can do a lot of damage," Cam says. "Hurricanes, droughts. If I could expect to reliably be everywhere it was doing damage I could get a lot done just by picking up rain in one place and putting it in another, but I can't, so given that I don't want weather systems to spiral out of control and be worse than they would've been, I guess I'll have to see about, I dunno, networking some wizards all over the world so we can keep patching the global weather system or something. Long term project." He writes this down.
pythbox: A book. (Default)
Author: pythbox
"You sure do plan ahead," Iggy observes.
lifes_sake: (tranquil)
Author: lifes_sake
"It's not so much a plan as it is an idea that I can't implement right now and don't want to forget about."
pythbox: A book. (Default)
Author: pythbox
"If you say so," says Iggy.
lifes_sake: (absorbed)
Author: lifes_sake
"Mmhm." Write write write. "Meteorology" is now on his list of mundane things to study under "nutrition".
pythbox: A book. (Default)
Author: pythbox
"Should I be leaving you alone?" it asks.
lifes_sake: (tranquil)
Author: lifes_sake
"I don't really care either way. I'm in a hurry to learn this stuff, but only a medium-term hurry, not like I have to be done with any specific thing in the next five minutes. Any wizarding tips, since you belonged to a wizard?"
pythbox: A book. (Default)
Author: pythbox
"Depends," says Iggy. "You had your Ordeal yet?"
lifes_sake: (intent)
Author: lifes_sake
"Nope. At least not so I'd notice. It's been a week, and I seem to be, you know, a wizard, maybe it was just very quiet."
pythbox: A book. (Default)
Author: pythbox
"Trust me," says Iggy, "you'd notice."
lifes_sake: (absorbed)
Author: lifes_sake
"In that case, nope, I am untested. How does that work, anyway, does the local senior wizard show up and manage to ring the doorbell despite being a cat and proctor an exam or what?"
pythbox: A book. (Default)
Author: pythbox
"Oh, no," says Iggy. "No, no, no - look, kid, if you want my advice, it's: quit while you're ahead."
lifes_sake: (restless)
Author: lifes_sake
"...Meaning?"
pythbox: A book. (Default)
Author: pythbox
"Meaning, if you haven't had your Ordeal yet, you shouldn't be planning too far into the future," says Iggy.
lifes_sake: (once more)
Author: lifes_sake
"Is that a vague premonition of dire consequences for failure that explain why it is called an Ordeal with a Capital Letter, or does the ordeal just shake things up enough to throw off any plans I make in ignorance of it?"
pythbox: A book. (Default)
Author: pythbox
"It killed my wizard," Iggy says plainly.
lifes_sake: (withdrawn)
Author: lifes_sake
"Well, shit. How'd it do that?"
pythbox: A book. (Default)
Author: pythbox
"Facing down the creator of Death will do that," says the rock. "Don't kid yourself, Cam. Adult wizards are leftovers. Young ones on Ordeal? Child soldiers, plain and simple. It's sick."
lifes_sake: (absorbed)
Author: lifes_sake
"That does sound pretty screwed up," Cam agrees. "Who set up the system?"
pythbox: A book. (Default)
Author: pythbox
"Who do you think?" says Iggy.
lifes_sake: (staredown)
Author: lifes_sake
"Well, if I were a terrible enough sort of entity to be the inventor of Death, I wouldn't wait for wizards to actually utter an oath, I'd just kill them in their sleep. Actually, if I were that horrible, possibly not even their sleep. So I'm guessing it's mediated by somebody somewhat less horrible, albeit either still pretty horrible or not all that competent."
pythbox: A book. (Default)
Author: pythbox
"No, see, that's the sick part," says Iggy. "I don't know which one of them's responsible, or how they do it, but after you take the oath you're guaranteed to run up against the Big Bad itself. And if you manage to get a hit in and live, good for you, but not everybody's that lucky."
lifes_sake: (restless)
Author: lifes_sake
"Yes, but, like, why is the Big Bad cooperating here, why isn't it just raining... itself... down on everybody indiscriminately till everything's extinct? Is somebody or something summoning it in response to wizard oaths? Or just letting it through some otherwise reasonably consistent screen? Does it have a deal with some grand high muckety-muck? Does it have severely limited attention but it can flag wizards by when they do the oathing and pays personal attention because wizards have more leverage to do worthwhile things? In that case why isn't it also visiting Norman Borlaug and particularly effective peace activists and disaster relief and medical researchers, because they have leverage too. And why in the world would it give up if some kid wizard gets one hit in, I mean, if it's still around nobody's managed to cripple or destroy it yet, right?"
pythbox: A book. (Default)
Author: pythbox
"Nobody's got infinite power and attention," says Iggy. "You ask me, it's the other Powers throwing you at the black sheep of the family, hoping you'll do some damage before it eats you. But what do I know? I'm just a rock."
lifes_sake: (absorbed)
Author: lifes_sake
"I definitely want a word with the management on a variety of counts, I'm just really unclear on the motives and the mechanisms here," mutters Cam. "But yeah, you're a rock. Maybe one of the wizards in the directory knows, maybe I should figure out how to visit a housecat."
pythbox: A book. (Default)
Author: pythbox
"Are you sure you want to talk to those guys?" says Iggy. "Me, I wouldn't trust 'em as far as I could throw 'em."
lifes_sake: (charisma)
Author: lifes_sake
"I could probably throw a housecat reasonably far," Cam says. "It's always better to have more sources, anyway."
pythbox: A book. (Default)
Author: pythbox
"Not if they're the same people who're throwing you into a war without even telling you you're on the front lines."
lifes_sake: (withdrawn)
Author: lifes_sake
"You think the housecat would do me actual harm above and beyond standard issue danger if I go have a talk? I'd be more circumspect about actual Powers. I don't have enough information to want their attention personally yet."
pythbox: A book. (Default)
Author: pythbox
"I've never met this housecat, how should I know? But it tells you something about these people that they send kids to do their dirty work, doesn't it? Even the wizards are part of that system - you see any of 'em showing up to warn you? You're right there in the directory, they could do it anytime."
lifes_sake: (tranquil)
Author: lifes_sake
"If they're checking the directory," Cam points out. "If they can spare the time. If they think warning me would help. If they can visit a fourteen-year-old boy at home without my mom being weirded out and calling the cops - admittedly not a problem the cat one has. If they didn't already try and just happen to show up while I was in school or at the library or down the street with Leafy or out at the theater. There's not that many wizards in the directory, I wouldn't be surprised if nobody has all the right features and luck."
pythbox: A book. (Default)
Author: pythbox
"Kid," says Iggy, "they're magic. If they wanted to talk to you, I'm sure they could find a way."
lifes_sake: (resolute)
Author: lifes_sake
"If it's a priority. I don't know what they're doing with their time, because the world doesn't really look to me like it's got highly effective altruistic wizards running around doing useful things to it, but I haven't met 'em, I'm giving them the benefit of the doubt for now. Frankly even if I had staggering amounts of magic power I would not necessarily spend amounts of it on individual kids liable to encounter trouble any more than it would make sense for Norman Borlaug to go grab a ladle at a soup kitchen. They don't know that I'm planning to be unreasonably effective and therefore an efficient use of time. A warning might not help. Maybe one of them kicked you into my yard specifically so you could warn me, I don't know. I'm steepening my learning curve as much as I can but the manual was all cautionary about boosting my brain."
pythbox: A book. (Default)
Author: pythbox
If rocks could shrug, Iggy would.

"Your funeral, I guess."
lifes_sake: (absorbed)
Author: lifes_sake
"I guess. How do ordeals go? How do wizards die?"
pythbox: A book. (Default)
Author: pythbox
"I only ever saw the one..." says Iggy.
lifes_sake: (resolute)
Author: lifes_sake
"It's still a data point."
pythbox: A book. (Default)
Author: pythbox
"He was doing a spell," Iggy recalls, "I forget what it was, but it went wrong... and the next thing I knew, we were in some kind of horrible alternate dimension. Big Bad seemed surprised to see us. That's why I think it's the other guys who pull that kind of thing. Anyway. We got out of there okay, but he'd overheard some of its plans, and when we got back... well, I guess it didn't want him telling anybody."
lifes_sake: (restless)
Author: lifes_sake
"He just - keeled over, or was there a more typical cause of death?"
pythbox: A book. (Default)
Author: pythbox
"I guess you could say there was a fight," says Iggy. "It wasn't much of a fight. He said half a spell and then went up in smoke."
lifes_sake: (staredown)
Author: lifes_sake
"That sucks. ...How does sensing stuff work for rocks? You don't have eyes. Or even a vestibular system, how can you tell when somebody kicks you?"
pythbox: A book. (Default)
Author: pythbox
"I am a magic rock," Iggy explains patiently. "I was a wizard's pet for a while; that kind of thing has effects."
lifes_sake: (tranquil)
Author: lifes_sake
"Sure, you're a magic rock, but, like, Grace can't feel it when I pat her, she doesn't have a nervous system. I assume magic is involved in how you could tell that I was sitting on you or that somebody picked you up, but that doesn't tell me what it's like."
pythbox: A book. (Default)
Author: pythbox
"I don't know what it's like for you either," says Iggy. "Why don't you try turning yourself into a rock?"
lifes_sake: (profile)
Author: lifes_sake
"I don't even know if that would yield the same experience," Cam points out, "leaving aside all the other reasons it seems like a poor choice. Are you discerning roughly the same facts about your environment that a human would be, though, even if you're doing them through funky magic senses?"
pythbox: A book. (Default)
Author: pythbox
"Sure," says Iggy. "Tree, sky, ground, chatty human who doesn't watch where he puts his butt."
lifes_sake: (staredown)
Author: lifes_sake
Cam snorts. "I'm chatty? Anyway, if the Big Bad can just literally set people on fire, and it pays attention to every newly oathed wizard, why are there any leftovers?"
pythbox: A book. (Default)
Author: pythbox
"Hey, if you wanna know how people survive their Ordeals, I am not the rock to ask," says Iggy.
lifes_sake: (charisma)
Author: lifes_sake
"Yeah, I think I'll go visit that cat," Cam says, flipping to the directory in his manual.
pythbox: A book. (Default)
Author: pythbox
"Good luck with that," Iggy says darkly.
lifes_sake: (charisma)
Author: lifes_sake
"Thanks," says Cam, snorting at Iggy's tone. "Look, I'm apparently already at risk, I'd rather have more information than less when Death comes scything along for me, you know?"
pythbox: A book. (Default)
Author: pythbox
"I hear ya," it says agreeably. "Figuratively speaking."
lifes_sake: (teasing)
Author: lifes_sake
Cam snorts. "Later, Iggy."

He gets up and tells Renée he's going downtown and he catches a bus to the cat's address.
pythbox: A book. (Default)
Author: pythbox
Nobody, feline or otherwise, is home.
lifes_sake: (absorbed)
Author: lifes_sake
Dangit. Who's next on the list?

Next on the list is not near a bus line. Walking there would have him home well past midnight even if the visit itself took no time at all; Renée wouldn't be happy.

Next after that is visitable but in a gated community. Cam can't get in.

Next one's not home either.

There are not that many Phoenix wizards, and Cam can't find any of them.

He goes home and goes to bed, fretful.

The next day is a Saturday. After breakfast he pops out to ask Iggy, "Do rocks get lonely? Are you getting along with that tree?"
pythbox: A book. (Default)
Author: pythbox
"That tree is a snob," Iggy says sulkily. "Better than being wedged into a storm drain, but not by much."
lifes_sake: (tranquil)
Author: lifes_sake
"I could put you someplace else," offers Cam. "Leafy's nice."
pythbox: A book. (Default)
Author: pythbox
"Oh, would you?" he says, wistful.
lifes_sake: (easy)
Author: lifes_sake
"Sure," shrugs Cam. He picks up Iggy.
pythbox: A book. (Default)
Author: pythbox
There is a subtle effect, like someone briefly dials down the brightness of the sun when Cam's hand touches the rock.
lifes_sake: (restless)
Author: lifes_sake
"...Do you have magic properties that activate when people touch you?" Cam asks Iggy slowly.
pythbox: A book. (Default)
Author: pythbox
"You're asking me?"
lifes_sake: (resolute)
Author: lifes_sake
"You're the one who may or may not have those properties," Cam says, holding Iggy at arm's length with one finger and a thumb. "Did your wizard cast something on you, or something?"
pythbox: A book. (Default)
Author: pythbox
"No, he just talked to me a lot," he says, aggrieved.
lifes_sake: (resolute)
Author: lifes_sake
"Something weird happened when I picked you up. Hey, tree, do you know what's going on by any chance?" Cam asks the tree. "Manual, Grace?"

"I don't know," Grace says.
pythbox: A book. (Default)
Author: pythbox
The tree ignores him.

Actually... the tree seems to have stopped moving.

So does everything else.

It's slow and subtle, but it's like Cam and objects on his person are now the only things in the world with life and movement.
lifes_sake: (vexed)
Author: lifes_sake
Cam frowns.

He puts Iggy back down, slowly.
pythbox: A book. (Default)
Author: pythbox
The effect remains.

"If you can't beat 'em," says Iggy's not-voice, "join 'em."
lifes_sake: (restless)
Author: lifes_sake
"I beg your pardon?"
pythbox: A book. (Default)
Author: pythbox
"I mean," says the same voice - or is it the same? - "how would you like to be immortal?"
lifes_sake: (staredown)
Author: lifes_sake
"...That sounds very nice. You know what also sounds nice, knowing what's going on, that would be nice."
pythbox: A book. (Default)
Author: pythbox
"A smart guy like you, I bet you can guess," says maybe-Iggy.
lifes_sake: (restless)
Author: lifes_sake
"I'm developing a hunch, except then you asked me how I'd like to be immortal, and I don't see how that fits."
pythbox: A book. (Default)
Author: pythbox
"Don't you?" it asks. "Kiddo, who else do you think can give it to you?"
lifes_sake: (intent)
Author: lifes_sake
"Well, yes, but, confused on motivations. Why would you like me to be immortal, given what I pretty much intend to do with any amount of life I happen to have?"
pythbox: A book. (Default)
Author: pythbox
"We-ell, there's the catch," it says mock-regretfully. "You'll have to tone that down a little."
lifes_sake: (once more)
Author: lifes_sake
"...I'm listening," says Cam.

Toning it down a little over a longer time could still net positive.
pythbox: A book. (Default)
Author: pythbox
"And you'll owe me some favours, of course. Nothing that goes too far against your better judgment."
lifes_sake: (resolute)
Author: lifes_sake
"I don't think I'm going to do any things that go against my better judgment, since that's what better judgment means."
pythbox: A book. (Default)
Author: pythbox
"Are you sure?"
lifes_sake: (profile)
Author: lifes_sake
"Of what I just said, yes, quite, of what currently constitutes my better judgment, not yet, feel free to address the members of the jury."
pythbox: A book. (Default)
Author: pythbox
"Heh," says probably-not-Iggy. "We'll just have to see, won't we?"
lifes_sake: (ordeal)
Author: lifes_sake
"What do you want?" Cam asks. Because he doesn't know. This is not how he would operate if he were anything horrible enough to invent death. If Cam were horrible and also powerful enough to invent death, everything that was not Cam would already be dead.
pythbox: A book. (Default)
Author: pythbox
"What do I want," it says musingly. "Well, a little appreciation would be nice."
lifes_sake: (restless)
Author: lifes_sake
"Bewilderingly enough, people appreciate the hell out of you, there are practically odes to death, people have to rationalize their way into sanity in the face of such an eventuality. There are all kinds of books where being immortal inevitably leads to misery, and stuff."
pythbox: A book. (Default)
Author: pythbox
"Oh, it does," the not-a-rock says carelessly. "I should know. But that's not the kind of appreciation I meant. Not that it doesn't give me a special little thrill when people lie to themselves."
lifes_sake: (withdrawn)
Author: lifes_sake
"Okay, that's really not how I'm wired personally, so what do you mean, then, what do you want from me, what am I looking at here?"
pythbox: A book. (Default)
Author: pythbox
"Did you know I also invented time?" it asks. "That's entropy's job. It gives the universe something to point at."
lifes_sake: (staredown)
Author: lifes_sake
"That's actually really interesting," says Cam, and he means it.
pythbox: A book. (Default)
Author: pythbox
"You won't get that kind of thing in your propaganda," it says, meaning the manual. "But it's true. I didn't just throw it in there so I could feel special. It solved a problem."
lifes_sake: (absorbed)
Author: lifes_sake
"Sounds like it. I am at least provisionally in favor of time."
pythbox: A book. (Default)
Author: pythbox
"Without the ability for the Universe to distinguish one moment from another, you wouldn't exist," it points out. "You seem like you're in favour of existing."
lifes_sake: (profile)
Author: lifes_sake
"Well, yes, but I haven't had very long to think about this problem and there might be a better way to distinguish moments than aiming the universe at entropy," Cam suggests. "Unless I think of one, having time-as-I-understand it seems like a reasonable approach."
pythbox: A book. (Default)
Author: pythbox
"And what would you do if you thought of one?" it asks, amused.
lifes_sake: (Default)
Author: lifes_sake
"...Write it down," says Cam. "And keep an eye out for implementation opportunities."
pythbox: A book. (Default)
Author: pythbox
It laughs.

Its laughter is not very pleasant.
lifes_sake: (vexed)
Author: lifes_sake
Cam will be over here, wincing and running his fingertips along Grace's spiral binding.
pythbox: A book. (Default)
Author: pythbox
"I think I like you, kid," it says eventually. "How's this sound? If I make you immortal, you swear off the run-around-causing-me-trouble part of wizardry and spend your time thinking up a better way than entropy to solve time."
lifes_sake: (absorbed)
Author: lifes_sake
"For forever? Because that is a long time, in that length of time I might wind up proving it mathematically impossible or something. In fact, if you have already done the mathematical impossibility proof, that makes issuing an offer like that way more likely, unless I am completely misunderstanding your interests somehow."
pythbox: A book. (Default)
Author: pythbox
"If you prove it mathematically impossible, I'll let you rethink the bargain," it says generously.
lifes_sake: (resolute)
Author: lifes_sake
"And does 'rethink' mean 'cancel and do something else with immortality', and if I do think of something, does it happen?" Cam asks slowly. "And for that matter, do I have any particular reason to consider you a trustworthy negotiating partner, 'Iggy'?"
pythbox: A book. (Default)
Author: pythbox
"I'm not going to make you immortal so you can spend the rest of eternity getting in my way," it says. "That would just be silly."
lifes_sake: (vexed)
Author: lifes_sake
"What do you want? Why do you care about doing the things that I'd be inclined to get in the way of?" exclaims Cam.
pythbox: A book. (Default)
Author: pythbox
"I'm proud of what I made," it says serenely. "It's not very nice, but it gets the job done."
lifes_sake: (staredown)
Author: lifes_sake
"You explained entropy. You didn't explain death."
pythbox: A book. (Default)
Author: pythbox
"It's all the same from where I'm standing," it says. "Without death, there's no life. Nothing moves forward. Complex life requires death to survive. Do you want to know how many things died to feed and clothe and shelter you for the handful of years you've lived on this cute little ball of dirt? It's a lot."
lifes_sake: (resolute)
Author: lifes_sake
"That number would in fact be mildly interesting since I could extrapolate it for grassroots activism later depending on how things go. But I don't mean, like, grass, though, grass is stupid, I mean people. By which term I include trees and so on, as of a week ago. And if you tell me we need death to power evolution my opinion of your creativity is going to take a nosedive; evolution happens when things run around dying and breeding and nobody's minding the store."
pythbox: A book. (Default)
Author: pythbox
"Nobody is minding the store."
lifes_sake: (resolute)
Author: lifes_sake
"Well, somebody should be minding the store, give me a key to the metaphorical store and I will mind the store."
pythbox: A book. (Default)
Author: pythbox
"Ooh, you should tell my siblings that," it says brightly. "I dare you."
lifes_sake: (restless)
Author: lifes_sake
"I'm almost guaranteed to get around to it if left to my own devices!" Cam replies, equally brightly.
pythbox: A book. (Default)
Author: pythbox
"Won't that be fun."
lifes_sake: (Default)
Author: lifes_sake
"Quite possibly."
pythbox: A book. (Default)
Author: pythbox
"Not for you," it says helpfully.
lifes_sake: (profile)
Author: lifes_sake
"Perhaps you have helpful suggestions on mitigating that."
pythbox: A book. (Default)
Author: pythbox
"Nope."
lifes_sake: (charisma)
Author: lifes_sake
"Then I'll probably do it anyway."
pythbox: A book. (Default)
Author: pythbox
"Good," it snorts.
lifes_sake: (restless)
Author: lifes_sake
Cam looks around to see if the world is moving again yet.
pythbox: A book. (Default)
Author: pythbox
It is not.

"Not so fast, kiddo. You haven't told me what you think of my latest offer."
lifes_sake: (profile)
Author: lifes_sake
"That's the one where you make me some unspecified kind of immortal, and I do think about alternatives to entropy and don't do some underspecified class of other things, and if alternatives to entropy provably don't exist, some unspecified form of rethinking happens?" Cam inquires.
pythbox: A book. (Default)
Author: pythbox
"I think 'don't get in my way' is pretty well specified, myself," it says.
lifes_sake: (absorbed)
Author: lifes_sake
"Does that apply solely to things I might do by magic? Does it prevent me from talking to anyone or anything? Are you personally monitoring all forms of death such that if I save a drowning toddler at some point this will constitute breaking the agreement or is that out of the bounds of what you have in mind and it only counts if I do something on a large scale? What about large-scale things that have nothing to do with magic, like, I don't know, making a lot of money and giving plenty of it to an organization that fights iodine deficiency in the Third World? Can I make tradeoffs that technically decrease net life as counted in individual organisms in order to help organisms that I consider more valuable and still be cooperating - like, some people have lawns, even around here, this is wasteful anyway, if I start anti-lawn campaigns and lots of stupid grass dies does that give me permission to magically help research on cancer in humans? Maybe I could skip the grass part if the cancer research is going to kill enough mice?"
pythbox: A book. (Default)
Author: pythbox
"You ask a lot of questions," it observes.
lifes_sake: (staredown)
Author: lifes_sake
"Yes," says Cam. "We also still haven't addressed the question of whether I can believe any answers you supply, but I'm asking anyway."
pythbox: A book. (Default)
Author: pythbox
"Has anyone ever told you that you have an attitude problem?" it inquires.
lifes_sake: (resolute)
Author: lifes_sake
"Yep," says Cam. "Usually people who don't think they've got answers I'll like."
pythbox: A book. (Default)
Author: pythbox
"Hah," it says. "Very funny."

lifes_sake: (absorbed)
Author: lifes_sake
"Are you going to specify the offer in enough detail and with enough verifiable sincerity that I can evaluate it, or not?"
pythbox: A book. (Default)
Author: pythbox
"Guess not," it says. "Bye now."

And the world resumes turning.
lifes_sake: (restless)
Author: lifes_sake
...What, really?
pythbox: A book. (Default)
Author: pythbox
Really!
lifes_sake: (absorbed)
Author: lifes_sake
Oooookay.

Cam goes inside.

He writes down everything he can remember about this conversation.

He tries visiting the cat's address again.
pythbox: A book. (Default)
Author: pythbox
In a word, no.
lifes_sake: (withdrawn)
Author: lifes_sake
And the others he can get to, also all no? Does the directory do phone numbers? He will try calling the ones who are not cats.
pythbox: A book. (Default)
Author: pythbox
The directory does phone numbers!

No one is home.
lifes_sake: (profile)
Author: lifes_sake
Curses. Can it do wizards farther afield? He'll deal with the argument about long-distance calls later.
pythbox: A book. (Default)
Author: pythbox
It can!

The first few he tries are not home either.
lifes_sake: (absorbed)
Author: lifes_sake
This is starting to look like a systematic problem.

Is the Lone Power known to have any capabilities that would render lots of wizards uncontactable? Do tell, dear manual.
pythbox: A book. (Default)
Author: pythbox
It frequently does things that cause large numbers of wizards to be very busy.
lifes_sake: (resolute)
Author: lifes_sake
Yeah, all right.

Cam investigates the news. What does the television have to say about things that might render large numbers of wizards very busy?
pythbox: A book. (Default)
Author: pythbox
The television offers no special clues.
lifes_sake: (withdrawn)
Author: lifes_sake
...Okay, maybe it just left him alone. The only source he has on Ordeals usually killing people was Iggy.

Cam writes a lot in Grace. About being afraid, unbalanced, trapped with nothing more than his own wits to defend himself. He wants to know more spells. He wants to be able to do more than just talk if anything like that happens again. He may wish to acquire an arsenal of enchanted objects, since there might be cases when he could get at one of those without telegraphing as much as he'll have to in order to utter Speech spells.

And then he looks up spells of protection.
pythbox: A book. (Default)
Author: pythbox
Spells of protection are many and varied! Some protect against magic, some against physical injury, some against very specific things like drowning or fire or poison or or or...

There are a lot of horrible things that can happen to a person, aren't there.
lifes_sake: (withdrawn)
Author: lifes_sake
There really are.

Cam is going to be proof against as many of them as possible, starting with magic and going down a prioritized list based on what freaks him out and what is most likely. He starts with defending himself against magic, then -

"Is mind control a thing? Or mental spying?"

The manual says it's not a common thing, but it's a thing, and there are spells against it. Cam casts one of those. It's kind of tiring. Also, it feels different, like he's not doing something new, just - adding a layer.

The manual, when prompted, says that some people have natural magical affinities for certain things. This particular affinity is not recorded, but nor is it particularly surprising.

All right. He moves on - general anti-physical-injury defense; he doesn't want to get hit by a cement truck and ruin everything; he should really have done this earlier but he wasn't confident in the Speech and didn't feel threatened enough, he supposes.

He's quite tired now.

Is there a danger to magical exhaustion beyond abruptly falling asleep, or can he safely cast things as long as he likes until his ability to talk coherently drops off?
pythbox: A book. (Default)
Author: pythbox
No danger, as long as he stops before he mispronounces something vital.
lifes_sake: (absorbed)
Author: lifes_sake
Ooookay.

Cam mutters through a tongue-twister to check himself, before moving on to the next spell. It's against diseases. He recites it slowly and carefully and does not mispronounce anything.

But he completely fumbles his next test tongue twister. He closes the manual and pats Gracenote and goes to bed.
pythbox: A book. (Default)
Author: pythbox
Tired as he is, he probably won't notice when a shell of air around his bed hardens into rocklike solidity. Nothing is getting in or out of that, other air included.
lifes_sake: (ordeal)
Author: lifes_sake
Cam doesn't notice.

But eventually he starts breathing strangely - faster, deeper, trying harder to extract oxygen.

"Cam," says Grace. "CAM!"

Cam's eyes open. The air tastes - wrong, stale - he sits up and hits his head -

"Grace - manual - help -" he chokes out before gasping in another breath.

And if the manual doesn't consider that specific enough instructions Grace shrieks at it, "Read Cam a spell that will let him breathe!"
pythbox: A book. (Default)
Author: pythbox
The manual's indexing feature is not quite that good! It tries, anyway - it finds a shieldbreaking spell that will work on this construct and doesn't require any materials that Cam won't be able to fetch.

If Cam can say the words in the first place.
lifes_sake: (ordeal)
Author: lifes_sake
He can say about half of them.

Then he can't.
pythbox: A book. (Default)
Author: pythbox




There's a sound like ripping cloth, and a pair of kids about his age stumble through a glowing hole in the air that seals itself shut behind them.

They're wearing nearly-identical dresses, one in blue and gold with a matching hair ribbon, one in white and red with four fewer inches of skirt. They're both giggling when they appear, but when they see Cam the smiles drop off their faces. The one in blue turns to the window and flings out her arms, speaking a series of crisp syllables that command it to open and a strong breeze to flow into the room. The one in red goes to one knee by the side of Cam's bed, puts both hands on the air-shield, and starts... talking to it.

"What are you doing? You're air! All this hanging around being solid must be so exhausting, look, there's a breeze going, I bet you could be in New Mexico by this time tomorrow if you hurried. Air's supposed to flow. Aren't you bored?"

Apparently all this - delivered in the Speech - is very convincing, because the shield releases and the breeze blows it right out of the room, taking the stale air with it.
lifes_sake: (Default)
Author: lifes_sake
Cam gasps a lot.

Grace speaks up instead. "Who are you and what happened?" She exclaims.
pythbox: A book. (Default)
Author: pythbox
"I'm Jellybean," says the one on the floor, tipping her—his?—their head up to grin at Cam and dragging a hand through their long curly hair. "That's Matilda. Sorry we're late, we almost didn't see you. You must've really scared you-know-who, he usually kills people while they're awake. Likes it when they can see it coming."

Matilda, meanwhile, is still directing the breezes, carefully unraveling her spell to leave the air behaving exactly like normal.
lifes_sake: (ordeal)
Author: lifes_sake
"Last I talked to it, it was trying to tempt me into taking some really vague deal..." Cam manages to say for himself. "Wouldn't describe it as scared. I think. What's it like scared?"
pythbox: A book. (Default)
Author: pythbox
"Scary," says Jellybean. "They all are. You okay?"
lifes_sake: (intent)
Author: lifes_sake
"I'll be fine, just my luck none of the defenses I cast handle suffocation, how did you know I needed help and what is with the Sailor Moon outfits?"
pythbox: A book. (Default)
Author: pythbox
"We track ongoing Ordeals," Matilda explains, lowering her arms and turning to face him. "Needing help is sort of the definition of being on Ordeal. We can't be there for all of them, but we try to get to the ones who are in the most trouble. Somebody went to a lot of trouble to try to hide you, but we're not sure who."

"And the outfits are for fun," says Jellybean. "Duh."
lifes_sake: (withdrawn)
Author: lifes_sake
"I don't know who'd want to hide me besides you-know-who. Is it relatively safe to name it, do you know? I haven't been in touch with wizards besides you. No one was home."
pythbox: A book. (Default)
Author: pythbox
"It's not dangerous to name it, I just think its name is silly," says Jellybean unrepentantly.

"No one was home because it's trying to put out the sun again," Matilda adds. "Don't worry, the wizards of Earth have it covered."
lifes_sake: (Default)
Author: lifes_sake
"It told me its name was Iggy when it was posing as somebody's orphaned pet rock. Put out the sun? Again?"
pythbox: A book. (Default)
Author: pythbox
"Stars and star-centred cultures call it the Starsnuffer," says Matilda. "It's an old trick. But as you can see, it hasn't managed it yet in this solar system."
lifes_sake: (Default)
Author: lifes_sake
"And no one has figured out how to prevent this from being such a systematic problem?" Cam asks, filing away the information that stars are people too.
pythbox: A book. (Default)
Author: pythbox
"What do you mean?" says Matilda.
lifes_sake: (restless)
Author: lifes_sake
"I mean I'm really confused about what Iggy wants and what it can and can't do and how much attention it's paying to what things. I am not coming up with any explanations that don't have it incompetent at using its powers, incompetent at directing its efforts, motivated to achieve ends that are not completely described by 'kill and entropize things', or playing by approximately gamelike rules for no obvious reason. If it wants me dead, why am I not dead? Why didn't it choose a faster method so you wouldn't have been here in time? Why isn't it trying again right now? If it has any chance of successfully putting out the sun - if extinguishing stars is a thing it routinely does - then why did it spend a couple hours talking to me? How much does it know and how does it find it out? If I knew the answers to these questions and had been studying magic longer than a week I would probably be able to come up with some reasonable things to do about stars, but my manual is not all that forthcoming about some topics."
pythbox: A book. (Default)
Author: pythbox
"It doesn't have the juice," says Jellybean. "Talk is cheap. Putting out stars takes effort. And you're dripping with wards - did you do all that before you went to sleep? It probably picked the cheapest way to kill you, and that means not blasting through them to just smoke you on the spot."

"Nobody can predict where we're going to show up, not even them," says Matilda. "And none of them can pay attention to everything, everywhere, all the time. If we hadn't shown up, you would be dead. If - heh - Iggy's busy enough with the Sun, it might be a while before it notices it failed."

"People do stop it from putting the stars out," Jellybean adds. "They're called wizards. You might've heard of them. But the wizards don't exactly have a direct line on what the Powers are up to. There's no good way to ward a star, not even if you've got the power to spare, it'd be a huge waste. So they just have to wait for it to take a shot."
lifes_sake: (withdrawn)
Author: lifes_sake
"Okay, but," says Cam, "when Iggy stopped pretending it was somebody's pet rock, it was like everything around me stopped. Is that not expensive? Because I can sure think of uses for inexpensive time pausing... I did do all my wards before I went to sleep, I was spooked. You keep saying them, is Iggy a bunch of people? Isn't it supposed to be all Lone? Also, please tell me what a fight over a star looks like, how do wizards notice before the star snuffs it, what do they do to interrupt the process?"
pythbox: A book. (Default)
Author: pythbox
"I don't know what's with the time-pausing," says Jellybean, shaking his head.

"Me neither," says Matilda. "Iggy's not a bunch of people, but there are other Powers. Just because they're nicer doesn't mean we're actually on their side."
lifes_sake: (absorbed)
Author: lifes_sake
"Fair enough," says Cam. "If I was a Power I'd have a lot of friendly objects set up to watch stuff for me, like how Grace told the manual to find me a spell when I couldn't breathe." He reaches over to his notebook and pats her.

"If I'd been faster you could've had time to say the whole spell," mourns Grace. "I'm so glad you're okay!"

"Me too," Cam tells her. And to Matilda and Jellybean he says, "Were you going to explain how fighting over stars work or don't you know?"
pythbox: A book. (Default)
Author: pythbox
"Well, I don't know how most wizards do it," says Matilda. "We've rebooted a star once. It wasn't inhabited, but it went out while we were passing through."
lifes_sake: (staredown)
Author: lifes_sake
"And, what, you just tell it 'wake up'? Do you - actually, you know what, my question about how you knew I needed help has not been answered, do your manuals helpfully update your directories in real time worldwide so you can show up when kids are Ordeal-ing or do you have some other kind of sensory network set up, also how did you get here, I want to learn to teleport too."
pythbox: A book. (Default)
Author: pythbox
"Ooh, worldgates," giggles Jellybean. "Worldgates are fun. You wanna go learn about worldgates?"

Matilda glances at Jellybean with a fond smile and then returns her attention to Cam. "Our manual taps the directory to see who's on Ordeal, and we have a few spells set up to check how well someone's doing so we know if we need to intervene. But the directory was really reluctant to mention you. I think the Powers were interfering, but I'm not sure why."
lifes_sake: (restless)
Author: lifes_sake
"You guys share a manual? I'm not sure why the Powers would interfere unless they've been paying - again, inexplicably allocated - attention. And if my various grandiose ideas have more substance to them than I'm quite sure of."
pythbox: A book. (Default)
Author: pythbox
"The Powers pay personal attention to every single person who takes the Oath," says Matilda. "That's how you get your wizardry in the first place."
lifes_sake: (withdrawn)
Author: lifes_sake
"Yes, but - have they been reading my notebook?" He picks up Grace and holds her close to his chest. "Is that the sort of thing they can do? I haven't been going around publicly stirring things up."

"Nobody but Cam is allowed to read me!" shrills Grace.
pythbox: A book. (Default)
Author: pythbox
"I don't know," says Matilda.

"They're not really forthcoming about how they work," says Jellybean.
lifes_sake: (intent)
Author: lifes_sake
"Speaking of how things work, the way you busted the air shell thing - that didn't sound very spell-like, it was all freeform, does that work for everybody or just you?" Cam asks Jellybean.
pythbox: A book. (Default)
Author: pythbox
"It works for me a lot better than it does for most people," he says. "I'm just really persuasive, I guess. Anybody can do it, but most of the time stuff just doesn't listen to you unless you work the spell up properly."
lifes_sake: (staredown)
Author: lifes_sake
"So it's a matter of persuasion and I can probably freeform little details on Grace but not the jerk tree in the backyard?" hazards Cam.
pythbox: A book. (Default)
Author: pythbox
Jellybean grins. "Yeah, exactly."
lifes_sake: (charisma)
Author: lifes_sake
"Hmm, okay. So is it just the two of you or is there, like, a vigilante hey-kids-dying-because-they-wanted-to-be-magic-is-screwed-up organization here I can sign up for?"
pythbox: A book. (Default)
Author: pythbox
They exchange a glance.

"It's just the two of us," says Jellybean.

"But if you wanted to sign up..." says Matilda.

"We could maybe work something out," says Jellybean.
lifes_sake: (tranquil)
Author: lifes_sake
"...Are the Sailor Moon outfits required?"
pythbox: A book. (Default)
Author: pythbox
"Yes," says Jellybean, and snickers.

"No," Matilda says kindly.
lifes_sake: (charisma)
Author: lifes_sake
Cam glances between them and decides to believe Matilda.

"Where do you guys operate out of?"
pythbox: A book. (Default)
Author: pythbox
"Everywhere," Jellybean says cheerfully.
lifes_sake: (tranquil)
Author: lifes_sake
"You don't have someplace you reliably sleep in? My manual was pretty clear that I could not put off needing to sleep forever."
pythbox: A book. (Default)
Author: pythbox
"Oh, I can talk myself out of it for a week at a time if I have to," Jellybean says carelessly. "But Tilly can't, so we find hotel rooms or camp out or whatever. Sometimes we go back to her mom's place for a while."
lifes_sake: (intent)
Author: lifes_sake
"Your parents fund the hotel rooms, or you're getting money on your own somehow? Or just teleporting into empty ones, I guess, and confusing the housekeeping staff. I don't think Renée would be on board if I told her I was going to wander the universe and needed cash to stay in a lot of hotels. I might not have quite as much freedom of movement as you guys."
pythbox: A book. (Default)
Author: pythbox
"We have one parent-like figure between the two of us," says Matilda, "and we mostly try not to lean on her too much. When we're on Earth and not staying with her, sneaking into an empty hotel room and cleaning up after ourselves when we leave is usually the way we go. The same when we're other places, if they have hotels there."
lifes_sake: (intent)
Author: lifes_sake
"...Other inhabited planets, let's hear all about that," says Cam.
pythbox: A book. (Default)
Author: pythbox
"There's lots," says Matilda. "We visit them sometimes. Looking for kids in trouble on their Ordeals, or fixing other problems, or just wandering around."
lifes_sake: (staredown)
Author: lifes_sake
"Cool. Well, that maybe explains why Earth is so badly run, if everybody's dividing their attention not only between it and endangered stars but also between it and other entire civilizations. Maybe Earth's comparatively nice as these things go."
pythbox: A book. (Default)
Author: pythbox
"There are places that are much better," says Matilda.

"And ones that're much worse," says Jellybean, grinning.
lifes_sake: (charisma)
Author: lifes_sake
"I want to hear all about your exploits on the problem-solving front," Cam says. "Sketch the space for me a bit, you've had longer at this than I have. I was thinking pretty Earth-centrically. ...Say, if stars are people, are planets?"
pythbox: A book. (Default)
Author: pythbox
"Short answer's no," says Jellybean, to that last question.

"I have a longer answer if you want," Matilda says brightly.
lifes_sake: (Default)
Author: lifes_sake
"Yes, please," Cam tells Matilda.
pythbox: A book. (Default)
Author: pythbox
"I've spent a lot of time figuring out what makes the difference to how smart things are," says Matilda. "In creatures with complex nervous systems it's brain activity, mostly the way you'd expect. I haven't figured it out for plants, but it might be partly dependent on size or length of life. In celestial bodies, it's thermonuclear fusion. Stars talk, planets don't."
lifes_sake: (absorbed)
Author: lifes_sake
"What about objects? Grace's component notebooks were pretty clever even before I zipped them all up into one. My manual's not as bright - or at least doesn't have as much initiative and personality."
pythbox: A book. (Default)
Author: pythbox
"Objects seem to be more case by case," says Matilda. "But I've almost never found one that seemed to have been really smart before anybody started talking to it. Maybe writing in a notebook is enough like talking to count."
lifes_sake: (profile)
Author: lifes_sake
"Grace has got a lot of me in her," says Cam.
pythbox: A book. (Default)
Author: pythbox
Jellybean giggles.
lifes_sake: (vexed)
Author: lifes_sake
"...Because I write a lot. There's forty-nine volumes of thoughts composing her."
pythbox: A book. (Default)
Author: pythbox
"That's cute," Jellybean asserts.
lifes_sake: (Default)
Author: lifes_sake
"What's cute about it?"
pythbox: A book. (Default)
Author: pythbox
"Dunno," he says cheerfully. "Just is."
lifes_sake: (once more)
Author: lifes_sake
"How did you come by a name like Jellybean, anyway?"
pythbox: A book. (Default)
Author: pythbox
"Hated the one I had," he says, "so I picked a new one."
lifes_sake: (absorbed)
Author: lifes_sake
"And you hated it enough that 'Jellybean' is an improvement. Okay. So. I'm Cam, the notebook's Grace, and I'm actually still really tired, so if Iggy's not likely to try to off me again perhaps we can meet and talk universe-fixing after I'm out of school tomorrow? I'm getting the impression you guys don't attend school."
pythbox: A book. (Default)
Author: pythbox
"You're getting the right impression!" says Jellybean.

"When and where would you like to meet?" asks Matilda.
lifes_sake: (Default)
Author: lifes_sake
"The local public library, at three-fifteen?" yawns Cam. "I'll tell Rénee not to bother meeting me, that I'm meeting some friends and I can walk home myself."
pythbox: A book. (Default)
Author: pythbox
"See you there," says Matilda, and Jellybean convinces the wall to let them walk through it, and Matilda casts an invisibility spell on both of them, and they go away.
lifes_sake: (absorbed)
Author: lifes_sake
Cam takes ten minutes to write confused notes-to-self in Grace, and then he waves his hand warily through the prior location of the air-shield, and then he goes back to sleep.

He is at the library the following day at ten after three.
pythbox: A book. (Default)
Author: pythbox
Matilda and Jellybean are reading a copy of the Iliad together.
lifes_sake: (Default)
Author: lifes_sake
Cam plops down in the seat across from them. "Hi," he says.
pythbox: A book. (Default)
Author: pythbox
"Hi!" says Matilda. Jellybean waves. They close the book.
lifes_sake: (resolute)
Author: lifes_sake
"About how often do you rescue kids from Ordeals?" Cam asks. He has Grace out, ready to take notes.
pythbox: A book. (Default)
Author: pythbox
"A few times a year, maybe," says Matilda. "But it's not regular. We had a dry spell of almost a year until you."
lifes_sake: (restless)
Author: lifes_sake
"Not that many wizards, or not that many needing to be bailed out?"
pythbox: A book. (Default)
Author: pythbox
"Fewer wizards than usual, and none of them needing our help except one we couldn't get to in time."
lifes_sake: (staredown)
Author: lifes_sake
"Any idea why fewer wizards, how does that work?"
pythbox: A book. (Default)
Author: pythbox
"Maybe the Powers were busy," says Jellybean.

"Maybe fewer people had the aptitude," says Matilda.
lifes_sake: (once more)
Author: lifes_sake
"So the Powers are personally intervening every time a manual lands on somebody's head, there's no automation?"
pythbox: A book. (Default)
Author: pythbox
Matilda shakes her head. "Yes and no. The Powers... nudge the manuals toward the sort of people who'd be useful. And when you take the Oath, it's the Powers who give you the wizardry to match. But sometimes the manuals find their wizards without a lot of help."
lifes_sake: (absorbed)
Author: lifes_sake
"Useful in combating entropy and that sort of thing?" Cam says. "Where do the manuals come from? Are they hiding wherever a sufficient mass of books hangs out, or do they spontaneously generate near appropriate wizards, or what?"
pythbox: A book. (Default)
Author: pythbox
Matilda shrugs. "If I had to guess, I'd say they're planted in bookstores and libraries. There's probably wizards who do it."
lifes_sake: (resolute)
Author: lifes_sake
"Do you know a lot of other wizards?"
pythbox: A book. (Default)
Author: pythbox
Jellybean snorts.

Matilda shakes her head.
lifes_sake: (Default)
Author: lifes_sake
"Why not? You could be more effective if there were more of you."
pythbox: A book. (Default)
Author: pythbox
"More effective at what?" says Jellybean.

"Most wizards wouldn't approve of our affiliation," says Matilda.

"And we're pretty sure there's some kind of policy about not interfering in anybody's Ordeal," says Jellybean.
lifes_sake: (staredown)
Author: lifes_sake
"At anything. Your affiliation, what's that mean? And that is a stupid policy that presumably gets people killed, surely the other kids you've saved get that even if others don't?"
pythbox: A book. (Default)
Author: pythbox
"Wizards work for the Powers," says Matilda. "We don't."
lifes_sake: (withdrawn)
Author: lifes_sake
"Because of policies like that one, presumably? And the Powers can't revoke or haven't revoked your wizardry?"
pythbox: A book. (Default)
Author: pythbox
"Once you have it, if you want it, it's yours," says Matilda.

"They can't revoke it even for people who are actually working for Iggy," says Jellybean.

"But needless to say, we disagree with a lot of their decisions," says Matilda.
lifes_sake: (absorbed)
Author: lifes_sake
"No kidding. Iggy said it'd be tremendous fun for it if I went up to the Powers and complained about how they're running this place," muttered Cam. "I guess it decided that it wouldn't be enough fun to risk having me run amok."
pythbox: A book. (Default)
Author: pythbox
"Even we've never tried that," says Matilda.
lifes_sake: (absorbed)
Author: lifes_sake
"My manual says a substantial fraction of its content is written by a Power. Does your manual still pull content normally?"
pythbox: A book. (Default)
Author: pythbox
"More or less," says Matilda.

"Sometimes I have to coax it," says Jellybean.

"And I think there's things we're blocked from accessing, but we can get by on what we've got," says Matilda.
lifes_sake: (profile)
Author: lifes_sake
Cam chews his lip a bit. "Grace, can you write in yourself?" he asks. "If I ask you to?"

"Maaaaybe," hums Grace.

"C'mon," Cam says. "You're a notebook, you're meant to have things written at you, you'd be better at your job if you could put them there yourself..."

"Oh, okay, if you say so," giggles Grace.

"Excellent. I want you to navigate the manual and transcribe the important parts as best you can just in case - you know what I'm looking for. Can you do that?"

"Yes I can!" says Grace brightly, and she commences bossing the manual around to read to her.
pythbox: A book. (Default)
Author: pythbox
"Smart cookie," says Jellybean approvingly.
lifes_sake: (Default)
Author: lifes_sake
"Grace at least won't defect on me," snorts Cam. (Grace is presently soliciting information on automation and on turning over the fine control of complex spells to objects.) "Can you hear her? I don't think I've seen either of you react directly to anything she's said."
pythbox: A book. (Default)
Author: pythbox
"Kind of," says Matilda, and Jellybean nods along.
lifes_sake: (easy)
Author: lifes_sake
"She's clear as a bell to me," Cam muses.

"I'm yours," Grace tells him over the manual's rapid monologue.

He grins and flicks her open to have a look at the ongoing transcription.
pythbox: A book. (Default)
Author: pythbox
"Awwwww," says Jellybean, leaning his head on Matilda's shoulder.
lifes_sake: (tranquil)
Author: lifes_sake
Cam flips a few more pages to find his long-term plan notes. "So, I had some things I was planning to learn to do enough magic to pull off, but like I said, pretty Earth-centric. Can I get a summary of conditions on other planets?"
pythbox: A book. (Default)
Author: pythbox
"There are a lot of other planets," says Matilda. "And we haven't visited all of them. But I can give you an overview, I guess."
lifes_sake: (teasing)
Author: lifes_sake
"Yes please. Grace, can you multitask well enough to transcribe the manual and something else at the same time? I bet you can, you're so smart."

"Oooh," says Grace. "Maybe."

"You managed to take everything I wrote and turn it into a personality, and the manual's not even talking that fast, I bet you can. I can't soup up my memory directly, yet, so I need your help, okay?"

"Okay!"

"You're the best," he tells her, patting her cover.
pythbox: A book. (Default)
Author: pythbox
"Awwwwwwwwwwwwwww," says Jellybean.

Matilda starts talking.
lifes_sake: (Default)
Author: lifes_sake
Cam listens, and asks questions. He's particularly curious if there are planets where magic is common knowledge, unlike Earth.
pythbox: A book. (Default)
Author: pythbox
There are some! Jellybean and Matilda avoid them most of the time. It's the same problem as they have with wizards, except with entire populations.
lifes_sake: (profile)
Author: lifes_sake
"So the Powers have a pretty good approval rating," Cam says. "For some reason."
pythbox: A book. (Default)
Author: pythbox
"Conventional wisdom is that they're the good guys," says Matilda. "Very few people seem to think they're insufficiently good."
lifes_sake: (vexed)
Author: lifes_sake
"But it doesn't sound like Earth is even significantly below average, here, do you have any idea how many people die of iodine deficiency and other stupid things like that?"
pythbox: A book. (Default)
Author: pythbox
"Presumably the argument is that Iggy causes all that, and the Powers are doing as much as they can to stop it. For all I know, they are," says Matilda.
lifes_sake: (restless)
Author: lifes_sake
"Are the various Powers all pretty much just souped-up wizards with lots of experience, or do they have extra abilities beyond that?"
pythbox: A book. (Default)
Author: pythbox
"We're pretty sure they're fundamentally not the same kind of creature as anyone else," says Matilda, "but it's hard to say how that affects their abilities exactly."
lifes_sake: (withdrawn)
Author: lifes_sake
"They're immortal, right? Do they have bodies? Was Iggy most likely being a rock or just resembling a rock or talking through a rock?"
pythbox: A book. (Default)
Author: pythbox
"Probably talking through," says Jellybean. "There might even have been a rock named Iggy once, that it was impersonating."
lifes_sake: (absorbed)
Author: lifes_sake
"I suppose I should actually scope out my backyard and see if there's still a rock hanging out under Jerk Tree."
pythbox: A book. (Default)
Author: pythbox
Matilda shrugs.
lifes_sake: (resolute)
Author: lifes_sake
"Does Iggy tend to attack you? Since you keep swiping wizards it's trying to kill?"
pythbox: A book. (Default)
Author: pythbox
"We're pretty hard to kill," says Jellybean.

"I think it's mostly given up," says Matilda.
lifes_sake: (staredown)
Author: lifes_sake
"Are you dripping with wards like the ones I started doing or did you come up with a shortcut?"
pythbox: A book. (Default)
Author: pythbox
"I have wards," says Matilda. "But tighter than yours."

"I just convinced my body to keep being itself," says Jellybean. "Can't do it to anybody else's, though, I tried."
lifes_sake: (absorbed)
Author: lifes_sake
Cam briefly considers Jellybean's approach, then turns to Matilda. "Tighter? What do you mean?"
pythbox: A book. (Default)
Author: pythbox
She explains!

It gets very, very technical, very, very fast.
lifes_sake: (withdrawn)
Author: lifes_sake
Cam listens, and Grace interrogates the manual about the technical details on his behalf, and she spits back something Cam can understand.

"All right. I'll put together something more like that. Is Iggy the sort to go after bystanders? Are my parents or school friends or anybody in danger?"
pythbox: A book. (Default)
Author: pythbox
"It might threaten 'em," says Jellybean, "but it doesn't just assassinate people because they hang out with somebody it doesn't like."
lifes_sake: (absorbed)
Author: lifes_sake
"So I don't have to convince Renée to hold still while I convince her person to forbid a long list of nasty eventualities. Or at least not because of Iggy. I might want to find a way to do it just because she's all mortal and stuff."
pythbox: A book. (Default)
Author: pythbox
"We warded Jenny," says Matilda. "But, yeah, not because of Iggy."
lifes_sake: (tranquil)
Author: lifes_sake
"Jenny's your mom? Does she know about magic?"
pythbox: A book. (Default)
Author: pythbox
"More or less," says Matilda. "To both those questions."
lifes_sake: (once more)
Author: lifes_sake
pythbox: A book. (Default)
Author: pythbox
"She adopted me when I was six," says Matilda. "I'll call her my mom in casual conversation, because it's mostly accurate, but I think of her as just Jenny. And we've told her that magic exists, and some stuff about it, but mostly she doesn't ask."
lifes_sake: (absorbed)
Author: lifes_sake
"Fair enough. I bet Charlie would mostly not ask. Renée on the other hand would totally ask."
pythbox: A book. (Default)
Author: pythbox
"Is that bad?" asks Jellybean.
lifes_sake: (profile)
Author: lifes_sake
"Not especially. I should probably tell her. She might write me notes to get out of school and stuff if I explain and tell her I'm off doing wizard things. Just sounds like a weird conversation."
pythbox: A book. (Default)
Author: pythbox
"You'll get used to those," says Jellybean.
lifes_sake: (absorbed)
Author: lifes_sake
"Sounds like an occupational hazard, yeah. Can people who haven't found a manual and said the oath and everything ever learn Speech just for conversational purposes? Talk to stuff but not cast spells?"
pythbox: A book. (Default)
Author: pythbox
"Yeah," says Jellybean.
lifes_sake: (easy)
Author: lifes_sake
"Renée will find that really fun, I bet," laughs Cam. "But it might start being impossible to talk her out of getting a pet."
pythbox: A book. (Default)
Author: pythbox
Matilda giggles.
lifes_sake: (charisma)
Author: lifes_sake
"So how do worldgates work?"
pythbox: A book. (Default)
Author: pythbox
"Worldgate loci tend to form around population centers," says Matilda.

"You can gate from anywhere, technically, but you have to shove a lot of power into it if you're not at a locus," says Jellybean.

"They let you open a temporary door between one place and another," says Matilda.
lifes_sake: (intent)
Author: lifes_sake
"But if you're at a locus you can gate to anywhere without extra power?" Cam asks. "How do you find loci?"
pythbox: A book. (Default)
Author: pythbox
"There's a trick to it," says Jellybean.

"He's really good," says Matilda. "I'm okay at it. The best place to look is in a train station or an airport or something like that, in the middle of a population center."
lifes_sake: (Default)
Author: lifes_sake
"What do they look like?"
pythbox: A book. (Default)
Author: pythbox
"They look like worldgates," says Jellybean. "I dunno."
lifes_sake: (staredown)
Author: lifes_sake
"Maybe you can show me one sometime," suggests Cam. "Are other planets generally pretty habitable or do I need to snug up my wards before I can go offplanet?"
pythbox: A book. (Default)
Author: pythbox
"Earth seems to be pretty normal in terms of atmosphere and radiation and so on," says Matilda. "But unless you know where you're going, you should be pretty sure of your wards before you go there."
lifes_sake: (Default)
Author: lifes_sake
"Makes sense. Is it necessary to go about invisibly on other worlds or are they pretty human-friendly?"
pythbox: A book. (Default)
Author: pythbox
"Depends on the world," says Matilda. "Some places you'd be fine. Some places you'd get about as much trouble as, well, an obvious alien walking around on Earth."
lifes_sake: (teasing)
Author: lifes_sake
"I think an obvious alien walking around on Earth would be okay in many places or certain times of year."
pythbox: A book. (Default)
Author: pythbox
"...Some of them, maybe," says Matilda.
lifes_sake: (Default)
Author: lifes_sake
"Some of them would stand out in Disneyland on Halloween?"
pythbox: A book. (Default)
Author: pythbox
"Considerably."
lifes_sake: (profile)
Author: lifes_sake
"Noted. Is the Earth setup of one species that can talk in not-Speech and lots that can talk in Speech pretty standard?"
pythbox: A book. (Default)
Author: pythbox
"Pretty much," says Jellybean.

"Some places, everyone uses the Speech," says Matilda.
lifes_sake: (intent)
Author: lifes_sake
"That sounds interesting," Cam says. "And everybody just talks to the local equivalent of trees as a matter of course?"
pythbox: A book. (Default)
Author: pythbox
"Yep!" says Matilda.
lifes_sake: (Default)
Author: lifes_sake
"Neat. How long have you two been wizards?"
pythbox: A book. (Default)
Author: pythbox
"Years," says Jellybean.

"Since I was six," says Matilda.

"Eight years," says Jellybean.
lifes_sake: (once more)
Author: lifes_sake
"Lucky. How come you got your manual so young and I didn't till last week?"
pythbox: A book. (Default)
Author: pythbox
"It's probably because I'm smarter," Matilda says matter-of-factly.
lifes_sake: (staredown)
Author: lifes_sake
pythbox: A book. (Default)
Author: pythbox
"Don't feel bad," she adds, "I'm smarter than most people."
lifes_sake: (absorbed)
Author: lifes_sake
"What's the average age these things get dropped on a person's head? Does it usually scale with intelligence?"
pythbox: A book. (Default)
Author: pythbox
"It's hard to calculate because different species are so different," she says. "But mostly late childhood or early adolescence. And the ones who get it earlier tend to be smarter, but it's not a sure bet."

"She's the smartest wizard we've met, though, and she got it youngest," says Jellybean.
lifes_sake: (charisma)
Author: lifes_sake
"Giving out IQ tests?" inquires Cam archly.
pythbox: A book. (Default)
Author: pythbox
"Nope," says Jellybean. "She's just crazy smart, wait a while, you'll see what I mean."

Matilda smiles slightly.
lifes_sake: (Default)
Author: lifes_sake
"Cam is really smart too," Grace pipes up loyally.

Cam pats her but has no further comment of his own on the subject.

He flips to his section on plans.

"So, all of this is pending while I learn more about the situations on non-Earth planets and set priorities, and any of it could be rearranged in terms of what's easiest to do and least likely to attract retaliation, but I think the highest leverage ends available - given what I've learned about how smart various things are, in particular - include things like pushing recycled paper and general anti-deforestation measures; intervening in relatively infrastructurally simple issues like the aforementioned iodine poisoning and possibly, depending on how easy it is to scale up, various forms of disease - as opposed to causes of death like war which would be a lot harder to address directly or safely; and food security, which is especially important to address because people are already working on it and could easily wind up throwing more rather than less intelligent food sources at the problem if this happened to be cheaper or easier."
pythbox: A book. (Default)
Author: pythbox
"I see what you mean," says Matilda.

Jellybean closes his eyes and leans his head on her shoulder.
lifes_sake: (charisma)
Author: lifes_sake
"Have you guys got any pending inroads on those or related things, or educational historical background of wizards meddling in world affairs that I should learn, or helpful notions on methodology that I shouldn't pollute with my own ideas before everything's been written down so we have a good diverse brainstorm?" Cam prompts.
pythbox: A book. (Default)
Author: pythbox
Matilda shakes her head. "We've never been so systematic. But I'm interested," she says.
lifes_sake: (Default)
Author: lifes_sake
"Okay. General categories of potential actions include motivated capitalism, sabotage-and-superheroism, and activism-type stuff. My naive guess is that the first is the most scalable and probably the most long-term productive unless one of us turns out to be really good at getting petitions signed or it's easier to do large amounts of magic by enchanting objects or whatever than I currently think it is. Inconveniently, it's also the hardest for a fourteen-year-old to do, because kids taking an interest in environmentalism or world hunger is cute and anybody doing sabotage-and-superheroism doesn't have to worry so much about whether anyone takes them seriously, but if you start a company to sell doctored potato seeds or whatever you have to be taken seriously."
pythbox: A book. (Default)
Author: pythbox
"Hmm," says Matilda. "But we do have access to adults."
lifes_sake: (tranquil)
Author: lifes_sake
"Yes. I don't think I want Renée managing a company for me, though - she's very scattered; even if she were only doing approximately what we told her she'd wind up dropping the ball somewhere. And she wouldn't want to give up teaching. Charlie's even less of a good idea. Would Jenny be more helpful?"
pythbox: A book. (Default)
Author: pythbox
"Probably," says Matilda. "She's busy - she runs a school - but if I asked, I bet she could find someone else to do that for her."
lifes_sake: (intent)
Author: lifes_sake
"Okay. So that's a possibility. Magic up some true-breeding really idiotic high-yield nutritious food, sell it, turn enough of a profit to outright give it away in key areas. Or pharmaceuticals, but that's probably harder to scale if we are in fact relying on magic for the purpose - except I think some pharmaceutical chemicals are actually made by bacteria, so maybe not that hard."
pythbox: A book. (Default)
Author: pythbox
"Chicken," says Jellybean, and giggles.
lifes_sake: (once more)
Author: lifes_sake
"Beg pardon?"
pythbox: A book. (Default)
Author: pythbox
"Chickens are only barely smarter than grass," Matilda explains.
lifes_sake: (intent)
Author: lifes_sake
"Oh, thank goodness, I can add chicken back into my diet," laughs Cam. "I didn't know anybody who kept chickens, I was basing everything on a goat I quizzed."
pythbox: A book. (Default)
Author: pythbox
"I don't think I've ever met a goat," says Matilda.
lifes_sake: (profile)
Author: lifes_sake
"Vivian the goat is capable of responding negatively to the question of whether she wants to be eaten and positively to the question of whether she's okay with being milked."
pythbox: A book. (Default)
Author: pythbox
"Chickens can tell you things about what it's like to be them right now, but they don't express preferences, they just - report," she says. "Like grass, if grass had more states of being than 'I'm grass!'."
lifes_sake: (Default)
Author: lifes_sake
"All right, I think I feel okay about eating them then. And extrapolating to turkey, unless you know specifically about those too. I should really just tour a farm or something, Renée'll take me if I tell her the whole story and what it's for."
pythbox: A book. (Default)
Author: pythbox
"Good idea," says Matilda.
lifes_sake: (profile)
Author: lifes_sake
"Apparently the senior wizard around here is a cat," Cam adds. "I'd need to look up statistics on how many cats are affected by various cat-affecting things to know how that sort of issue stacks up against chopping down trees and various human stuff and the offplanet equivalents, though."
pythbox: A book. (Default)
Author: pythbox
"Honestly," says Matilda, "I bet you could spend a couple lifetimes just prioritizing at all. Might as well start on your own planet. It's practically bite-sized in comparison."
lifes_sake: (absorbed)
Author: lifes_sake
"With any luck I'll live a very, very long time, but you have a point. I'm also less likely to stumble into a bad misstep on a familiar world. And I can get started on productive work instead of learning curve sooner."
pythbox: A book. (Default)
Author: pythbox
"And once you've fixed Earth you'll have a better idea of how to do the rest," she says.
lifes_sake: (tranquil)
Author: lifes_sake
"Yeah." He chews his lip a bit. "You two want to meet Renée and help me explain magic to her?"
pythbox: A book. (Default)
Author: pythbox
"Sure," says Jellybean. Matilda nods.
lifes_sake: (intent)
Author: lifes_sake
Cam packs up - his manual is still reciting things to Grace; it's on healing spells now - and leads them to his house.

"Mom!" he calls. "I brought some friends home!"

"Do they want cookies?" Renée calls back.
pythbox: A book. (Default)
Author: pythbox
"Hell yes they do!" says Jellybean.
lifes_sake: (Default)
Author: lifes_sake
"If your friends want cookies they'll keep their language age-appropriate," sings Renée's voice.
pythbox: A book. (Default)
Author: pythbox
Jellybean mutters something under his breath, intentionally unintelligible. Matilda giggles and calls out, "Yes please we would like some cookies!"
lifes_sake: (easy)
Author: lifes_sake
"That's better! You can all come in and introduce yourselves!"

Cam leads Matilda and Jellybean into the kitchen. "Matilda, Jellybean, this is my mom Renée." He takes a cookie off the cooling rack for himself.

"School friends?" Renée says, evaluating Jellybean's sex and outfit and tilting her head but not commenting.

"No, uh, a hobby thing," Cam says. "Actually I thought you might want to hear about it, is why I invited them over." Pause. "It is unrelated to how they're dressed."

"Oh, I was wondering just a little," Renée admits.
pythbox: A book. (Default)
Author: pythbox
Jellybean cracks up.

Matilda pats him on the head and grabs a cookie.
lifes_sake: (tranquil)
Author: lifes_sake
"Yeah, that's just them, they think it's fun," says Cam, "I am still all about jeans and t-shirts. The hobby is magic."

"You never seemed that interested in your stage magic kit that you got two Christmases ago," Renée says.

"Yeah," Cam says. "It was fake."

Renée peers at him.

"Guys, do you have a standard demo that usually works or should I make something up?" Cam asks Matilda and Jellybean.
pythbox: A book. (Default)
Author: pythbox
Matilda smiles mischievously.

She beckons to the cookies.

One of them leaps into her hand, and she hands it to Jellybean.
lifes_sake: (intent)
Author: lifes_sake
Renée makes an eep noise.

"Oh, cool, you didn't even have to say that aloud," Cam says.
pythbox: A book. (Default)
Author: pythbox
"I'm really good at moving small objects around," she says proudly. "It's handy!"
lifes_sake: (teasing)
Author: lifes_sake
"It sounds it, what's the spell?"

"Cam," says Renée weakly.

"Oh. So, yeah, I can do magic, so can they, we're wizards, I'm new at it and they've been at it for a while." Pause. "I'm learning it out of a magic book. Also the vegetarianism thing is because wizards can talk to things that can't talk and I was alarmed about how smart some of it was, but it turns out that chickens aren't much brighter than grass, which is to say really dim, so we can add poultry back in. That's why I wanted to go visit Lori and went out to see the goats, I wanted to see if I needed to worry about them. I do - I'm still not going to eat any mammals. Trees are an issue, too, they're pretty much as smart as humans."

Renée looks dubiously at the cookie in her hand.

"The cookie doesn't care, Mom, go ahead."
pythbox: A book. (Default)
Author: pythbox
"I don't really use a spell for it," Matilda says. "I just kind of - want at them. I think it's my affinity. Some people have those."

She nibbles her cookie.

"These are really good!" she says, and Jellybean tries his and agrees enthusiastically.
lifes_sake: (tranquil)
Author: lifes_sake
"I have one of those," Cam says. "One of my wards is a mental thing and it already had company when I cast it. Not as practical."

"Thank you," Renée says to Matilda and Jellybean, recovering her equilibrium somewhat.

"Mom, if you want, you can learn the language to talk to stuff, but you can't be a wizard," Cam says.

"...That does sound interesting," admits Renée.
pythbox: A book. (Default)
Author: pythbox
"It's awesome!" says Jellybean. "I love talking to stuff."
lifes_sake: (staredown)
Author: lifes_sake
"What do cookies say?" Renée asks, looking dubiously at them.

"I don't really want to address the cookies. Talking to stuff makes it smarter, even if it doesn't make it smart enough to matter. But I talked to one of your muffins the other day. It just said it was a muffin. It didn't have anything else to say," Cam tells her. "I imagine cookies are about the same."
pythbox: A book. (Default)
Author: pythbox
"Yep," says Matilda. "Prepared food in general is about on the grass-and-chickens level. It can state what it is and that's about it."
lifes_sake: (charisma)
Author: lifes_sake
"And I can talk tofu into tasting like whatever," Cam says. "Since I'm guessing mammals in general are probably about as smart as the goats."

"Well," says Renée. "That... opens up interesting culinary possibilities."

Cam grins. "So, um, now that I can teach myself an extremely practical skill, all self-study, I might want some time out of school here and there to go work on wizard projects. Can I get you to write me notes for that and tell anybody who asks that I'm suddenly rather chronically ill?"

"...As long as they're legitimate projects and not all gallivanting off for fun," says Renée thoughtfully, crossing her arms. "Gallivanting can wait for ordinary school vacations. And you will have to make a reasonable effort at keeping up in classes." She peers at Matilda and Jellybean. "Do you two go to school?"
pythbox: A book. (Default)
Author: pythbox
"Nope," says Jellybean.

"There's really nothing they teach that I couldn't teach myself faster," says Matilda.
lifes_sake: (tranquil)
Author: lifes_sake
"Matilda's mom is a teacher too," volunteers Cam.

"Really," says Renée with interest. "And does she know about - wizarding?"
pythbox: A book. (Default)
Author: pythbox
"Yep!" says Matilda. "She noticed when I dropped out of school, it'd be hard for her not to, she's the principal."
lifes_sake: (Default)
Author: lifes_sake
"I'm not sure how I feel about you dropping out, Cam."

"What if I take the GED or something?" Cam offers. "Test out?"

"...Maybe. Will the test just... tell you the answers, though?"
pythbox: A book. (Default)
Author: pythbox
"The test won't necessarily know the answers," Matilda says reassuringly. "And it won't just volunteer them, so he'll only cheat if he tries and then gets lucky."
lifes_sake: (charisma)
Author: lifes_sake
"Well, then, maybe. Goodness knows school has never managed to provide you with a meaningful challenge, but you're still only fourteen."

"I know, Mom. I'll take the test, I'm not just going to teleport to Mexico City or something if you say I can't."
pythbox: A book. (Default)
Author: pythbox
Jellybean rolls his eyes and takes a cookie.
lifes_sake: (intent)
Author: lifes_sake
Renée gives Jellybean a bit of a sharp look but doesn't remark on the eyeroll. "What are you planning to do, Cam?"

"Plans haven't solidified yet, really, but options include starting a business to sell useful magic stuff, that seems like one of the most promising avenues," Cam says. "I'm thinking magicked medicine or food or both, but in the shorter term it'd probably take fewer resources to set up something like a computer repair shop and command all the devices to behave and get startup funds that way. Or I could win the Randi Prize. Is there some reason not to win the Randi Prize? Why is it still sitting there? Do you guys know?" These last questions are directed at Matilda mostly, Jellybean secondarily.
pythbox: A book. (Default)
Author: pythbox
"This world's categorized as generally hostile to magic," says Matilda. "I guess nobody wanted to cross that."
lifes_sake: (charisma)
Author: lifes_sake
"I was thinking I'd show up invisible and ask for the prize in unmarked bills," Cam says. "I don't really want James Randi to be a huge part of my life, but I would like his million dollars, and I'm sure he'd be fascinated to see me win them."
pythbox: A book. (Default)
Author: pythbox
"Go for it," says Matilda.

"I wanna watch," says Jellybean.
lifes_sake: (tranquil)
Author: lifes_sake
"I don't see why you shouldn't, if you be invisible too," Cam tells Jellybean. "Mom, this would involve me going to - Grace, I can't remember -"

"California," says Grace.

"California."

"Grace?" Renée asks.

"I condensed all my notebooks and into one, which talks, and I named it Gracenote," says Cam.

"...Oh," says Renée. "Gracenote. That's cute!"
pythbox: A book. (Default)
Author: pythbox
"It is adorable," says Jellybean. "I want to hug it."
lifes_sake: (tranquil)
Author: lifes_sake
"No!" says Grace petulantly. "Nobody but Cam. I'm Cam's."

"You realize that might be impractical at some point," Cam says. "I can't think of a good reason for anybody else to be handling you right now, but something might come up."

"Well, if you say so, but I don't want Jellybean to hug me just to hug me," Grace says.

"Okay," says Cam.

"If you made them all one, why are there two?" Renée asks.

"The other's my wizard manual," Cam says. "It's disguising itself."
pythbox: A book. (Default)
Author: pythbox
Jellybean hugs Matilda instead. Matilda ruffles his curly brown hair.
lifes_sake: (charisma)
Author: lifes_sake
"I'm going to have to learn this language just to follow your conversations, aren't I," remarks Renée.

"I can translate for stuff if you need me to, but yeah, pretty much," says Cam.
pythbox: A book. (Default)
Author: pythbox
Matilda and Jellybean both giggle.
lifes_sake: (Default)
Author: lifes_sake
"I think I'd like to meet Matilda's mother. And Jellybean's family too," Renée says.
pythbox: A book. (Default)
Author: pythbox
"You are wrong," says Jellybean, with a weird bright mock-cheerful note in his voice. "You do not wanna meet my family!"

"You can meet Jenny, though, if you want," says Matilda, smoothing her hand down over Jellybean's hair in a comforting gesture.
lifes_sake: (Default)
Author: lifes_sake
"...Why don't I want to meet your family, Jellybean?" Renée asks, suddenly very much a concerned kindergarten teacher.
pythbox: A book. (Default)
Author: pythbox
He grins. It looks more like baring his teeth than anything.

"'Cause my dad's dead and my mom's boring?" he suggests, still brightly.
lifes_sake: (absorbed)
Author: lifes_sake
"Boring," says Renée, not impressed with this assessment.

"I'm guessing she doesn't know about magic," Cam says.
pythbox: A book. (Default)
Author: pythbox
"I haven't talked to her since I left home," says Jellybean, shrugging. "And I probably never will again."

He grabs another cookie and stuffs it in his mouth.
lifes_sake: (Default)
Author: lifes_sake
"Do you live with Matilda and her mother, then?" Renée asks tentatively.
pythbox: A book. (Default)
Author: pythbox
Jellybean nods. He cannot answer out loud, because of the cookie.
lifes_sake: (Default)
Author: lifes_sake
"All right then," says Renée. "Then I'd just like to meet Matilda's mother, that will do. Where do you all live?"
pythbox: A book. (Default)
Author: pythbox
"New York," Matilda supplies.
lifes_sake: (profile)
Author: lifes_sake
"What were you doing all the way down here?" Renée asks.

"Visiting me," Cam says, before either of the others can reply. "The wizard manuals tell us where to find other wizards. I showed up in the book recently."
pythbox: A book. (Default)
Author: pythbox
Matilda raises her eyebrows at him.
lifes_sake: (Default)
Author: lifes_sake
He glances at her but doesn't conspicuously acknowledge this.

"That's nice of you to come by and introduce yourselves, then," Renée says. "Did you meet each other by both being wizards too, or did you know one another before?"
pythbox: A book. (Default)
Author: pythbox
"We went to school together," says Matilda.
lifes_sake: (Default)
Author: lifes_sake
"Goodness only knows how long ago," remarks Renée, but she doesn't actually ask. "May I have your mother's phone number, Matilda?"
pythbox: A book. (Default)
Author: pythbox
"Sure," she says, and pulls a pen and small notebook out of thin air, and writes it down and hands it over and puts the pen and notebook back into the thin air from whence they came.
lifes_sake: (once more)
Author: lifes_sake
"Where'd you get those? I got disappointing results on conjuring stuff out of thin air, when I asked," Cam says. "Do you have them tucked away somewhere or did you make them?"

Renée, meanwhile, crosses the room to the phone and dials.
pythbox: A book. (Default)
Author: pythbox
"I have them tucked away," says Matilda. "It's just a space pocket. It's convenient not to have to keep stuff physically with me all the time, especially pens and things."
lifes_sake: (tranquil)
Author: lifes_sake
"I want one," says Cam.

Renée is listening to the phone ring.
pythbox: A book. (Default)
Author: pythbox
Matilda starts in on the spell specifications.

Someone answers the phone.

"Hello?" says the someone.
lifes_sake: (Default)
Author: lifes_sake
"Hello, is this Matilda's mother?" inquires Renée.

Grace helps Cam with the technical translation. He mutters a space pocket into existence.
pythbox: A book. (Default)
Author: pythbox
"...I guess you could say that," says Jenny. "Who's calling, please?"
lifes_sake: (Default)
Author: lifes_sake
"My name is Renée, and your daughter and her friend who I'm told is called Jellybean are sitting in my kitchen; my son invited them over."
pythbox: A book. (Default)
Author: pythbox
"I hope they're having a good time," Jenny says brightly.
lifes_sake: (Default)
Author: lifes_sake
"I've offered them cookies," Renée said. "Anyway, I just wanted to call to check in with you. They say they've told you that they're wizards?"
pythbox: A book. (Default)
Author: pythbox
"They have," says Jenny. "I'm now wondering why they've told you that they're wizards. They usually don't."
lifes_sake: (Default)
Author: lifes_sake
"Well, my son is one too," says Renée. "He's talking about leaving school, which I gather Matilda and Jellybean have already done."
pythbox: A book. (Default)
Author: pythbox
"Oh, yes," says Jenny. "Well, Matilda doesn't need it and no one in this or any world is ever going to convince Jellybean to do something he doesn't feel like doing, so it made sense. If your son wants to leave school and go off wizarding instead, I advise you to let him."
lifes_sake: (Default)
Author: lifes_sake
"He's talking about taking the GED to test out of high school," says Renée. "I have mixed feelings about it, but apparently you're an educator yourself."
pythbox: A book. (Default)
Author: pythbox
"Mmhmm," says Jenny. "It's a good way to reassure you. I'm glad he thought of it."
lifes_sake: (Default)
Author: lifes_sake
"What's your name, by the way?" Renée asks.
pythbox: A book. (Default)
Author: pythbox
"Jenny," says Jenny.
lifes_sake: (Default)
Author: lifes_sake
"It's nice to meet you. At any rate, that's about all I have to say. From the way Cam and the others are talking I imagine you'll have a chance to meet him eventually."
pythbox: A book. (Default)
Author: pythbox
"I probably will," Jenny agrees cheerfully.
lifes_sake: (Default)
Author: lifes_sake
"Would you like my number in case anything comes up?"
pythbox: A book. (Default)
Author: pythbox
"Sure," she says agreeably.
lifes_sake: (Default)
Author: lifes_sake
Renée recites it, and with the obligatory pleasantries gets off the phone. "She seems to think it's a good idea to let you out of school," she tells Cam.

"She's right," says Cam.
pythbox: A book. (Default)
Author: pythbox
Jellybean giggles.
lifes_sake: (tranquil)
Author: lifes_sake
"I'll have to explain it to Charlie, though," Renée points out. "I doubt you're planning to explain magic to him any time soon."

"Yeah, I don't think he'd take it that well. I'll take the test, we can tell Charlie I tested out and I'm doing independent study, he'll like that I have more flexibility to visit him whenever, won't he?" Cam says.

"I suppose he will," says Renée. "Well, you can just have the flu for the next week or so, I'll look into the GED for you. If Matilda and Jellybean need a place to stay while they're in town we have a guest room and a couch."
pythbox: A book. (Default)
Author: pythbox
"That's very kind of you!" says Matilda.
lifes_sake: (once more)
Author: lifes_sake
"You can divide them between yourselves whichever way you please," Renée says. "We probably don't want to put Jellybean on the floor of Cam's room in a sleeping bag; he talks in his sleep."

"What?" exclaims Cam. "Do not."

"Yes you do," says Grace.

"Oh," says Cam. "Grace says I do."

Renée laughs. "You've been doing it since before you could even properly talk."
pythbox: A book. (Default)
Author: pythbox
Matilda and Jellybean exchange a glance.

"We can just take the guest room," says Matilda.
lifes_sake: (Default)
Author: lifes_sake
"...What, both of you?" Renée asks.
pythbox: A book. (Default)
Author: pythbox
"Yes," Matilda says firmly.
lifes_sake: (Default)
Author: lifes_sake
"If I call Jenny and ask her, what do you think she will say?" Renée asks.
pythbox: A book. (Default)
Author: pythbox
"I think she will say that it's not even slightly out of the ordinary for us," says Matilda.
lifes_sake: (staredown)
Author: lifes_sake
Renée considers this, then decides not to bother calling their bluff. "All right. I'll get you a sleeping bag."

When Renée has left the room to get a sleeping bag, Cam says, "You might just want to let her think one of you's going to use it whether you are or not."
pythbox: A book. (Default)
Author: pythbox
"Sure we're going to use it," Jellybean says cheerfully. "Extra blanket."
lifes_sake: (profile)
Author: lifes_sake
"Okay. And Matilda, you kinda looked at me funny when I omitted certain things about Iggy, but I don't think telling would help, she'd worry and couldn't do anything."

Renée reappears. "The sleeping bag's set up in the guest room," she says. "Dinner will be at six, and I can stretch it for four. I assume you can amuse yourselves till then?"

"Sure, Mom," says Cam.
pythbox: A book. (Default)
Author: pythbox
"Thank you," says Matilda.
lifes_sake: (absorbed)
Author: lifes_sake
"You're welcome," says Renée, and she takes a cookie, looks dubiously at it, and goes to sit in the living room with a book.

"I," says Cam, "am going to check the yard for Iggy."

And so he does.
pythbox: A book. (Default)
Author: pythbox
Iggy is nowhere to be found.
lifes_sake: (profile)
Author: lifes_sake
"Rock's gone," says Cam to the other two wizards.
pythbox: A book. (Default)
Author: pythbox
"Huh," says Jellybean.
lifes_sake: (once more)
Author: lifes_sake
"How do you guys usually decide what to do next, anyway, if you've been all unsystematic about everything?"
pythbox: A book. (Default)
Author: pythbox
"We... just kind of do stuff," says Jellybean.

"Whatever springs to mind," says Matilda.
lifes_sake: (staredown)
Author: lifes_sake
Cam looks at them, then decides not to extensively criticize their lack of systematized attempts at accomplishing useful things when they did - however incidentally - save his life.

"Okay. As long as I've got Grace transcribing from my manual and it's currently unrestricted as far as I know, is there anything yours won't tell you that you particularly miss?"
pythbox: A book. (Default)
Author: pythbox
Matilda shakes her head. "Mostly it's things like blocked directory entries, that a static transcription wouldn't help."
lifes_sake: (staredown)
Author: lifes_sake
"Fair enough," says Cam, "she can keep doing what she's doing. Have any of you got a good spell for long-distance communication?" he inquires, including the manual as well as both wizards in this address.
pythbox: A book. (Default)
Author: pythbox
The manual volunteers several options; Matilda suggests only one. Hers is very efficient, and works more or less like a telephone.
lifes_sake: (charisma)
Author: lifes_sake
Cam likes her idea best. "If I set that up, then we can split up and I can coordinate with you without cramping your style too much," he says. "How long will it take for you itinerants to get bored hanging around Phoenix while I wait to pass the GED and be allowed to properly drop out?"
pythbox: A book. (Default)
Author: pythbox
"Not long," giggles Jellybean.

"Probably longer than usual," says Matilda, "if we keep chatting with you along the way. But I bet we'll be moving on in a week."
lifes_sake: (Default)
Author: lifes_sake
"What are you guys good at apart from wizarding?" Cam wants to know, heading back inside from the Iggy-free yard.
pythbox: A book. (Default)
Author: pythbox
"Trouble," says Jellybean.

"Math," says Matilda.

"Flirting," says Jellybean.

"Reading," says Matilda.
lifes_sake: (once more)
Author: lifes_sake
"You might have to explain 'trouble'," Cam tells Jellybean. "That sounds either useful or anti-useful depending."
pythbox: A book. (Default)
Author: pythbox
"Trouble: getting into, getting out of, causing," says Jellybean. "Fixing's more Tilly's speed."
lifes_sake: (staredown)
Author: lifes_sake
"Yeah, I don't mean what do you do with the trouble, I mean, what constitutes trouble here?"
pythbox: A book. (Default)
Author: pythbox
"Depends, doesn't it?" He shrugs. "It's not like I keep a list."
lifes_sake: (Default)
Author: lifes_sake
"Can I have examples?"
pythbox: A book. (Default)
Author: pythbox
He can have several!

Matilda interrupts occasionally to explain a detail or prevent him from including something unnecessarily shocking.
lifes_sake: (resolute)
Author: lifes_sake
Cam is somewhat curious about the contents of the unnecessarily shocking parts!
pythbox: A book. (Default)
Author: pythbox
"Well, if you wanna hear the juicy details..." says Jellybean.
lifes_sake: (teasing)
Author: lifes_sake
"Maybe start with one juicy detail and I'll see if I prefer to hear its relatives too."
pythbox: A book. (Default)
Author: pythbox
Jellybean proceeds to explain just what went on between him and the nice lady with the tentacles.
lifes_sake: (Default)
Author: lifes_sake
"I will pass on further of same," Cam says after listening quite levelly to this story.
pythbox: A book. (Default)
Author: pythbox
Jellybean giggles. "Suit yourself," he says. "She was sweet, though. And cuddly."
lifes_sake: (once more)
Author: lifes_sake
"Aren't you my age?" Cam asks.
pythbox: A book. (Default)
Author: pythbox
He shrugs. "I'm fifteen, what's it to you?"
lifes_sake: (teasing)
Author: lifes_sake
"It's not my business, but I'm sort of curious about how many stress-related diseases I'd be dying of if it were."
pythbox: A book. (Default)
Author: pythbox
Jellybean snickers.
lifes_sake: (staredown)
Author: lifes_sake
"I'm not sure what I'm going to be when I grow up but I'm pretty sure it won't wind up calling for tentacled aliens."

"Hmm," Grace says.

"What?" Cam asks her. "I hope you're not about to contradict me about the tentacled aliens, I'd have to believe it if it came from you."

"No, I think you're right about that. I might be more able to figure out what you're going to be when you grow up than you are, though," Grace offers.

"...Later. Privately," Cam says.
pythbox: A book. (Default)
Author: pythbox
Jellybean grins. "Your loss," he says cheerfully.
lifes_sake: (charisma)
Author: lifes_sake
"I'm sure," snorts Cam. "I think I want to cast that snug ward today - Matilda, do you think I know everything I need to to get it right the first time or were there details omitted or possible customizations I should think about? Is it going to knock me out such that I should wait till bedtime?"
pythbox: A book. (Default)
Author: pythbox
"We could cast it with you if you need the boost," Jellybean offers. "The setup's more complicated, but it takes less out of you."

"Otherwise it probably will knock you pretty flat," says Matilda.
lifes_sake: (easy)
Author: lifes_sake
"Cooperative casting! I'm sold. How's that work?"
pythbox: A book. (Default)
Author: pythbox
"Well, we all put our names into the spell," says Matilda, "linked up so it's obvious who's the target and who's just lending a hand, and then we say it together."
lifes_sake: (intent)
Author: lifes_sake
"My name name, or the nine-paragraph monstrosity that the worksheet thing spat out? Is there a way to trim those and have them work? I don't really feel like my favorite ice cream flavor is key to my identity."
pythbox: A book. (Default)
Author: pythbox
"It's kinda chancy," says Jellybean.

"Yeah, says you," Matilda says fondly, ruffling his hair. To Cam, she adds, "It's usually a good idea to go with as complete and accurate a name as you can manage, but accuracy is more important than completeness. Which is why Jellybean's is so short."
lifes_sake: (staredown)
Author: lifes_sake
"What's yours?" Cam asks Jellybean.